I want this to work. Really. I wouldn’t spend so much time and fucking energy fretting about it if I didn’t. He’s busy, I need to deal with it. C’est tout. Finish en klaar. But I also don’t want to feel neglected. Tricky. But I do not have energy for too much D.R.A.M.A

I thought of taking up a part time job. I actually applied somewhere. A bookstore, obviously. I could really do with some extra money; my rent is astronomical. I’m also working on some shitty articles for a popular Afrikaans daily. It’ll do me good. Remember I spoke to the Editor about writing something for his newspaper? I need to use Malcolm‘s Press Card for free movies on a Thursday – I’ve only been twice. Hell, I could even ask him if I could write a review on the movies and then he can publish it… I’m even thinking of doing volunteer work. But all these are not to become busier, so as to keep up with Victor. No, I have been contemplating doing all of these for months. I’ve been meaning to join Toastmasters for years. Well, for one and a half years only.

Although it is very satisfying to come home and not to have anything to do: no art exhibition opening to attend, no book launch to mingle at and no Christian birthday partay to suffer through.

In other news

It’s V’s day. Argh. At least he sent me an email. He promised last night that he’ll try to be more communicative. I guess it’s a step in the right direction.

Tonight was supposed to be a girlie evening with my spessal fwend – Susan. But I don’t really feel like trekking all the way to her anymore. Instead, I’ll spend tonight at home. Lalita might pop in for an hour or so. If not, then it’s still cool. I’ll have myself some Pongraz then.

And then I’ll spend a couple of hours with Victor this weekend. But first I need to spend some quality time with my pwetty lady!

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My dear Expensive Mistakes and Cheap Thrills tagged me with a 50 things you didn’t know about me challenge. I guess it’s as punishment for commenting on her list… Oy vey. So here goes!

1.      I read dictionaries. For fun.

2.      My standard order at a restaurant begins like this: “Please may I have a tall glass of water with no ice or lemon.” This is followed by a confused look on the waiter’s face, possibly because it happens to be a HOT day.

3.      I imagine scenarios in my head and play them out. This could happen anywhere, so beware!

4.      I’m lazy and messy and my flat is always a disaster area. I don’t do dishes very often, but that’s ok because I don’t eat much. So there’s hardly anything really to clean. But my flat’s almost always deurmekaar.

5.      I’m addicted to the internet.

6.      My very best friend is actually not very clever and I look down on her for that. But I love her still. Eeek.

7.      One glass of wine is all it takes.

8.      My debt is close to 60k, though possibly closer to 50k these days – I think. The last time I did calculations was in early 2007

9.      I don’t have any degrees or diplomas. I never studied after school but I have a job that required a degree just to be interviewed. So I guess I’m really good at marketing myself.

10.  I tend to wear clothing to showcase my ample cleavage to work.

11.  I was forced to resign from the job before this one. I received a tidy settlement and partied! Well, as much as a geeky girl can party…

12.  I’m very honest; if I don’t like you, you’ll know.

13.  I bought my very first CDs some weeks back.

14.  I used to struggle to open CDs until I got my own…

15.  I would love to be a stay-at-home mom.

16.  At times I think I might be the only person in the whole wide world who has not seen Titanic…

17.  I taught myself how to play chess.

18.  Toby and I moved in together after knowing each other for only 2.5 months.

19.  I am basically an only child. I have two half sisters (mom), one half sister (dad), four half brothers (dad), one step sister (step dad) and one step brother (step dad). My dad’s other daughter has kroes hair and I hate her for it. Why can’t she be pretty?

20.  I love cooking for friends, not lovers or myself.

21.  I spent my teenage years reading…and I slightly regret it now.

22.  Once, I was in desperate need for cash… I phoned an escort agency in the area I used to stay, and worked there for one night. This means I can never become president. Or if I do, I’ll legalise prostitution. And I’ll make them pay tax, damn it!

23.  I think about dying at least once or twice daily.

24.  I’ve had many, many, many crushes on gay guys.

25.  I’m concerned Victor may have found this blog… He asked me something last Sunday that got me thinking about the blog. Fuck.

26.  I once got evicted for not paying rent.

27.  I’m petrified of anything happening to my face. I’m very shallow in that regard. But it’s because I *do* have a pretty face…

28.  There used to be a picture of my darling kitty in Long Street, opposite RCafe. It’s gone now. *sobs silently*

29.  I have lost my brilliant ability to write in Afrikaans, yet I contacted an editor at a leading newspaper and asked if I can write a weekly column for the paper. Silly me.

30.  I dig lay-buys! I wish more stores can offer them. I’m currently lay-buying a sideboard. Ja, I’m old-fashioned!

31.  There are some books that I read just so that I could say I have read them.

32.  I hate being the same as everyone else. I need to be contrary. And that quality has lost me many jobs!

33.  I take customer service very seriously. Very, very, very, very, very seriously. Much more serious than most other people. And I get sorted out because I know who to complain to.

34.  I love the idea of reading the Sunday Times… not actually reading it!

35.  I have a foul, foul, disgusting mouth. I’m very polite on this blog…

36.  I don’t think I’ll ever get a learner’s license… what for?

37.  That woman, whatshername… Andie Mcdowel, I can’t stand her. There’s something about her eyes… and her acting that just bug me.

38.  My bags are mostly old-fashioned ones.

39.  I used to read music when I was little, but I could actually listen and play much better. I found the music reading very confusing.

40.  Victor and I met through Datingbuzz!!

41.  I’m a girl.

42.  I don’t trust people who don’t drink…except one person, of course. And that’s only because I love you so much, my darling!!

43.  Silence is golden. Nuff said.

44.  I’m a loner.

45.  I need a date for the poetry thingy at Spier.

46.  I hate brands (well, most of them) but love to be seen at the “right” places.

47.  Right now, I treasure this moment. It’s quiet, I’m alone, I’m not stressed out, I’m sated and I’m writing. What can be better?

48.  I don’t watch television much.

49.  I dislike all clubs, though I might go if you’re insistent enough. Let’s rather share a superb bottle of wine or bubbly in my flat and talk kak about whatever.

50.  When I get married, I wouldn’t want to stay in the same house as my spouse. I would only want to see him/her once a week. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, they say.

51.  My rent is half of my nett salary.

Yeah, I know it’s 51 things… I just wanted to be contrary. He he he he.